Absolut hella good hair

A very wise friend once said that your hair is the crown you never take off, make sure to take good care of it. And she wasn’t wrong. It is after all one of the biggest things people notice about you.

As the saying goes: “To the fella over there with the hella good hair”

So who do you trust with your permanently fitted crown? Being on of the things I get most compliments on I need to have the best team and products to back me of course.

So many good things can be said about the team and service from Absolut Hair Claremont and the products from System professional.

So let me run you through how a day at my “hair spa” goes. Of course, like anybody else, booking essential, and thanks to my manager that always does that for me. I will arrive at the end of Wilderness street and upon walking, the first hug I get is from Portia. Her smile alone is enough to make your day. Next, it’s the man himself. The king of the kwaph, the master of manes, Steven Phillips. Also the only man I trust with clippers close to my ears. A title and achievement in itself.

Steven and I will sit down and discuss what event I am preparing for, what style Ill be going with, length, color that suite me……remember this point we are going to come back to it.

You’ll be seated for a wash, with a view I might add. Let me tell you, very few people can give a head massage like these guys, its honestly like a day at the spa, aka you’re completely useless afterwards. You’ll look fabulous. But you will be a zero to the world.

After my wash, it’s a quick cut session with Steven. And boy can the man work a pair of scissors, probably the only person that can make even sheep sheering look good. Speaking of sheep, remember that point that I said to remember? Let’s get back to that. So, coming from a Afrikaans / Portuguese family, we are exactly that, curly haired sheep. Well I am at least. Portia will then perform THE SUITE, kind of like a Brazilian, but better, after a few minutes and another quick was, perfectly straight hair.

If ever I was to become a fringe flicker, it would be now. Normally with my luck, its during this time that I feel like Patricia Lewis with her extensions that I am lucky enough to see Ryan, the other part of the management team. After a little chat and catchup, Ryan makes his exit but not before showering me with System professional gifts, from Keratin boosters to balancing lotion, to color saving shampoo and conditioner, Wellasugar spray, Wellasuperset hair spray (for hair that can stay perfect through a 6 hour long shoot or a hurricane, whichever comes first), Nioxin thermal protector. The list goes on. This is of course very easy to determine what products I need because my energy code mapping was done when I walked through the door the first time. Oh! I even got the proper styling brush to use for the style my hair is cut in……#spoiltwrotten!

Back to Portia we go. I have no shame to admit that I color my hair. Well, Portia does. A dark tint, almost like the scene from Miss Congeniality. “Another two coats, then seal it” Another quick wash and then its go time. By now Steven has an exact picture of how I want it cut and styled for the upcoming events. It’s a quick clip here, a cut there and a few thorough run throughs to make sure its perfect, then its time to style the crap out of it. He makes it look so easy, so seamless. My hair falls perfectly. Bending and moving to his every stride as he runs his fingers through them. Oh, did I mention Im on my second gin and tonic by now? This is hard work, don’t judge.

You know how you look fantastic as you walk out the salon and after the next shower and attempt at getting your hair the way it was you end up looking like a sad mop? Not the case here, Steven shows you how to recreate your look. Let’s be honest, it wont looks as good as when he did it, but it will get you by until your next visit.

After a day here, I feel ready to take on the world, perfectly styled, pitch black hair and all.

So this review is just my views and opinions, Absolut was so kind as to give me two prizes to give away to two lucky followers to have a amazing hair retreat with them.

Check back with me in a week or so and lets hear what their views of the experience is.

Check them out on Facebook or Instagram or book your treatment with them.

A very big thank you to Ryan, Steven, Portia, everybody on the Absolut team, System professional and Wella for the amazing treatment, service and hair that doesn’t turn heads, but breaks necks.

Until next time. Stay true and do you boo.

JP Robberts
Tel:021 671 3928 / 52
Address: Shop 5, The quadrant, Wilderness Rd, Claremont.


  1. I very much enjoyed reading this JP. 😉 True! Your hair ALWAYS looks Fab-u-lous! 👌 I live less than 2kms from Absolut! Think I need to experience what ur talking about – without the G&T of course.😄

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